Some thoughts on the moon landings

I have been lapping up all the documentaries and material on the Apollo 11 moon landing 50 years ago that I can get my hands on, and a thread I had never really thought about before, but was brought to my awareness after reading Carrying the Fire by Michael Collins started to really stand out to me. As you watch the documentaries it is obvious that the moon landing was not just a massive scientific endeavor, but it was a political move as well as an attempt to bolster American moral and assert dominance. A theme that comes up repeatedly is the public's questioning of the monetary cost that was going into testing, building, and manning the missions to the moon. The concern that the money could have been spent better in other places, and that even if we succeeded (which was not a guarantee), that the gains made from that feat would not be worth the million dollar price tag.

But, quietly, because it isn't paired with loud images of protest and discontent, come the words of the astronauts and sometimes even their former wives talking about the toll it took on their families. The fact that most of the engineers, technicians, and coordinators were putting in a Herculean effort towards the common goal of a lunar landing, but that their relationships with their families were put onto the very back burner during that time, often with disastrous results. The media coverage and pressure, the danger the astronaut's husbands were going into, and the lives they held in their hands through their part of the process would be enough to stress any marriage, but the long years of living marriage in snippets took their toll, and most of the astronauts and many of the people working in NASA at the time saw divorce and the crumbling of their marriage.

Gene Cernan, the last man to walk on the moon, spoke with regret of the selfishness of the astronaut's life in a documentary about him and his journey into history via the Gemini and Apollo programs. Yes, they were doing something gloriously impossible which helped to bring unity at a hard moment in history and has inspired millions, but at its roots the space program rewarded selfishness.

I'm not trying to write a widespread condemnation of NASA, saying we shouldn't have gone to the moon, or saying that Christians shouldn't be astronauts. But I have been thinking over how easy it is to let the pursuit of a good thing trick us into a life of selfishness, when we have convinced ourselves we are being servants. I have seen the devastating effects in too many missionary families of relationships offered on the alter of service in God's name, and it reminds me that my heart is deceitful above all things, and easily deceived. Howe easily I can convince myself that something I'm doing is more important than the people God has put in my life and the relationships He has called me to. How easy it is for me to decide what I want is better than what I'm called to do.

So, as I marvel at the ingenuity of man, made in God's image, and appreciate the adventure of the Apollo program, I'm reminded how important people are, and how important it is for me to not isolate myself in pursuit of my own agenda, but to listen to the Spirit's promptings about ministering to and investing in the lives God has brushed against mine. To remember that it's not just achievements that matter, but running the race well. To remember that I'm not a good teacher if I bulldoze over my students to get there.